Don’t Make It Personal: The Art of Saying “No” as a Product Manager
Let’s talk about why saying “No” in the right ways is important.
Well, the daily routine of a Product Manager (PM) includes many moments when you have to say “No,” and you will say this word repeatedly to your stakeholders in your career.
Some of us may suffer from being unable to say no, or you just don’t know the best way to do it. It’s probably because it’s apart of our daily lives and culture to prefer to say “Yes.”
I hope that as you read further, I can provide you with the right tools and tactics in order to say “No,” and I promise you — it won’t affect your relationships or your reputation.
Let’s learn the art of saying “No.”
Product managers like myself are always trying to do the most effective work with limited resources; And it’s important to not waste those resources and use them efficiently.
As product managers, we spend more time deciding what not to build than what to build; So if you say “Yes” to all of your stakeholders, you have to ask yourself — at the end of the day, will it be the product you want to build in the first place? Or is it totally something different?
Every product must have a vision, just like us, and saying “Yes” to everything will only compromise the vision for your product.
Why Knowing How To Say “No” Is Important
When a stakeholder comes to you with an idea, you can’t just say “No.”
Instead, have a conversation with your stakeholders to determine if it’s not a personal idea they just came up with. It’s important that the idea is based on research, valid data, product roadmaps, previously agreed upon requirements and scope, etc.
The objective is to encourage stakeholders to share and be transparent about the reasons why.
Listen and Ask Questions
Make sure you listen to everything carefully, sometimes you may miss details, and it’s okay. We’re all human and we can get exhausted. For the details you didn’t understand, ask questions to fill in the gaps.
Check with your stakeholder to see if you missed anything; And ask the right questions to demonstrate that you’ve understood what your stakeholders have said.
You can also show this by summarizing what you understand from the conversation. You can ask these questions below;
1. Why is it important? This is a very simple question that helps you understand their opinion of that item’s importance. Go with the basics in the first place.
2. Is it in our scope?
3. When should we do it?
4. Is it urgent?
5. Does it make delay our roadmap timeline in any way?
Explain Your Reasons Why
Before saying no, explaining why is as important as saying no.
Is it because of the cost? Or is it out of your scope? There can be many reasons, but make sure you explain those reasons, to ensure you’re on the same page with your stakeholders. You can also explain the current scope, product roadmap, next steps, and any other relavant details that can justify your position.
The Art of Saying “No.”
If you’re going to say no, before you do, make sure of the following:
After demonstrating that you’ve understood, and you explain why — you’ve now laid the groundwork in order to politely say no.
Before you do — keep in the back of your mind that the hope is — the conversation would have impressed upon the stakeholder that you will say no; And at the moment you say no, the important thing is to not make it about you, and don’t make it personal.
Ensure that reasons for saying no are based on research, data, users, costs, etc.… so don’t ruin the moment it by saying “Because I say so,” or “I’m saying no,” because this is not about you.
It’s not about being subjective. It’s about being objective.
Be careful, because If your “No” comes from the wrong place, your stakeholders may not share your opinions, and saying no for the wrong reasons will harm your relationships with your stakeholders.
In a nutshell — saying no is about knowing when to say no, how to say no, and when to say “Probably not at this time.” It’s important to be aware of these options so you won’t disappoint your stakeholders.
It’s techniques like the before mentioned I use while saying “No.” It’s also the same type of approach I look for while hearing “No” from others.
Like all the other stories of mine, this story will be updated in time.
Thank you for reading so far! Feel free to contact me on LinkedIn
Best Regards, Yağmur.
Special thanks to Tremis Skeete, Executive Editor at Product Coalition for the valuable input which contributed to the editing of this article.
